Ten minutes into watching “Underworld” and I already hate it. Abysmal.Now, of course Chance was talking about a film that has one of the finest screenplays of the 21st century. So I had to call him up and explain that to him.
But that wasn't the real reason for this conversation.
No, the secret agenda I had in mind was to persuade Chance to make more movies. I mean, he made Hide and Creep and Interplanetary for crying out loud. He freakin' invented the zomedy.
You can just barely make out the part of our conversation where I downloaded the mind virus into his head. He'll be making a movie that's a cross between Escape From New York and Apocalypse Now.
(Which is also funny because The Imaginary Opera is also a cross between those two movies. To learn more about The Imaginary Opera you have to read my Tyrannosaurus Mouse blog.)
In any case, we created a directors' commentary about a movie neither of us had any involvement in. A movie that had a craft services budget which surpasses the total budget for all our movies to date. A movie called Underworld. Note that we do not stay on-topic.
The machine transcript
The keywords the computer picked out:
michael sheen, science fiction movie, eighties action movie, commentary track, guitar player,bill nice character, trench coat, blade series, star wars, machine pistols, kate beckinsale,funny thing, vampire movie, blade runner, honestly felt, play guitar, forbidden planet, white clean, downtown birmingham, big crazy, music written, liberty island, arrange parts, comic con, star trek
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