Thursday, June 23, 2011

What I need

I need a mockbuster (by the way, that's a trademarked term owned by The Asylum) of John Carter of Mars.
I need a Total-Recall-like movie too.
Ooh, wait. Darkchylde! Somebody write a script about a teenage girl who turns into nightmare creatures!
Hey! A Halo mockbuster!
But what does my sales rep want? DRAGONS! Dragons attack New York. We can do that, right?
The thing is we can do any story. Just put it in a world where dragons are attacking New York City. It's an interesting kind of freedom. A hitman and his girlfriend try to get away from the mob -- while dragons are attacking New York City. Or a teenage girl comes into her inheritance but must fight her evil aunt -- while dragons are attacking New York City. Or a man learns he will rule Scotland as his wife goes insane and freakin' dragons attack New York City. You get the idea.
Here's a Blender dragon.

6 comments:

Jeff said...

I think you just may have something with that last one. Add some prophesy about the forests of Hoboken, and I'm in.

(My word verification is "poncy" - no lie.)

Andrew Bellware said...

When Jersey City wood to Roosevelt Island doth come... and then he sees a barge full of treated lumber coming across the Hudson...

Ha! "Poncy". I wish I could set it up to use that word whenever Nat Cassidy comments! ;-)

Chance Shirley said...

Aren't the John Carter on Mars books all public domain at this point? That is to say, do you need a John Carter mockbuster, or do you just need to make a full-on John Carter movie?

(Also, I wish I had time to write that movie for you.)

Andrew Bellware said...

Word on the street (via Bill Cunningham) is that John Carter and such are trademarked by the Burroughs estate. So although the works are public domain the names of the books and characters aren't.
The bad news is that our distributor kinda went "meh" over a John Carter movie.
Whaddaya mean you don't have time? You have plenty o'time! C'mon! ;-)

Chance Shirley said...

That's weird about the John Carter stuff. Also weird that the Asylum did a "Princess of Mars" book a while back, and I can't imagine they paid for the rights. But maybe they did, who knows?

But I guess it's all moot since the distributor isn't interested. Hey... what if you made a John Carter movie that also featured a bunch of dragons?

Andrew Bellware said...

I'm kind of under the impression that dragons are ALWAYS good. So more dragons it is then! ;-)