Monday, October 19, 2009

Stop Loving Me So Much!


We got some reviews of the Japanese version of Alien Uprising. It's called "Alien Revenge" in Japan (or エイリアン・リベンジ if you prefer.)

Japanese is very difficult to translate properly. Safe to say, these reviewers absolutely loved the work and can't get enough of it!

Here's one from "La la la" (When copying text from Google translate, it seems to copy a whole bunch of both English and Japanese):
SF Alien's low-budget original video that is no shame in the work is not to revenge and revenge is not alien to the alien and not come in since.
基 本設定的には『エイリアン4』ぽいのでエイリアンのでないエイリアン4という感じですね、一応囚人惑星の囚人たちをある大企業が実験体にして囚人1人を不 死身の化け物にすることに成功しておりその彼が普通の人間の姿で顔にそれらしいマスクをかぶっただけで出来損ないのゴリラの物まねみたいな格好で襲ってく るだけの内容でした。 In the basic configuration is not Alien Alien 4 Alien 』Poi 4 because it is felt that the prisoner's body to test a large company of the planet prisoners and one prison一応able to make people immortal monster only the contents of the sweep was dressed like a poorly-made imitation of a gorilla wearing a mask only likely to face in the form of a man and his ordinary.
ちなみこれ一体だけです。 This is the only integrated Chinami.
この程度のことしかできないので大勢出すわけにはいかないのでしょう、舞台は明らかにどこかの貸倉庫という感じでした。 Can not put a lot because you can only do this around the reins, feeling that the stage was a clear field warehouse somewhere.
海兵隊員たちはヘルメットの両脇にペンライトを付けてるだけというお粗末な姿で歴戦の海兵隊員のはずなのに素人に言いように振り回されあっさり倒されたりします。 Marines will be swayed and brought down to simply say I should have been an amateur in his Marine veteran that just because they are poor on both sides of the helmet with a penlight.
CGを使う余裕は何ので70年代のSF映画のような光線や爆発合成をしております。 CG afford to use the SF 70's, so what we like and the synthesis of light and explosion of the film.
当 然俳優さんたちはへたくそばかりで吹き替えはいつもの子飼いのへたくそどもなのではっきり言って字幕でもても吹き替えで見ても目も当てられません、一番酷 いのは超低予算名ために襲ってるシーンやその後など病や仕切れないためかわざと見えにくくしており映像も最初から最後までぼやけており平気でライトの逆行 撮りをしたりとにかく詳細を見えないように撮影しており完全に逆光になってます。 Of course the actor who dubbed dub is just terrible to look at but not even seen it in a different language subtitles dub us so frankly trained from boyhood in the usual, I hit the scene for the most severe low-budget traveler sun is completely invisible and taken to the details or just taking in cold blood against the light and blurry footage from beginning to end what has been deliberately obscured so as not partition and subsequent disease and Masu.
はっきり言ってみる価値がないのでパッケージのデザインで借りないようにしてください Please design a package to借Rinai not worth it honestly


Another snarky review:
The original title is 'Alien Uprising'. ターミネーター・プラネット 」のアンドリュー・ベルウェア監督によるSFアクションです。 "Planet Terminator," directed by Andrew Bell SF ware action.

連絡の途絶えた辺境の監獄惑星へ派遣された宇宙海兵隊の面々。 Surface of Space Marines were sent to prison on a frontier planet lost our contact. 囚人たちによる反乱かに思えたのだが、そこで彼らを待っていたのは異形の怪物だった…。 But you seemed to revolt by prisoners, where they had been waiting for a deformed monster ....

お話の方はこれまでの「エイリアン」シリーズをごちゃ混ぜにしたような感じ。 If this story is to "Alien" feels like a series of pell-mell. まぁお陰でこれまでのベルウェア監督作に比べると格段にストーリーが判りやすくなってました(w。これはやっと監督自身の脚本じゃなくなったというのもあるでしょう。 Temashita story is much easier to understand and work than ever thanks to Director wear Maa Bell (w. It is there that I was finally directed his own screenplay's not.

でも演出の方は全く進歩の跡無し! 相変わらず霞がかかった様なボンヤリ画面の中、誰がどこで何をやってるのかさっぱり判らない始末。 If the director is no evidence of any progress at all! Of the screen took a lazy haze like usual, refreshing Are you unsure how to dispose of anything that anyone anywhere. 会話シーンすらまともに見せられないくらいで、当然アクションシーンになると何がナンやら。 The scene even talking about not showing properly, and what will Yara Nan action scenes of course. おそらくは上手、下手の概念も判ってないんじゃないでしょうか。 Well, perhaps I do not think the concept of判Tsu not bad.

というか、根本的な問題なのが、怪物の正体は巨大企業が極秘裏に進めていた遺伝子操作実験によって誕生した生物兵器で、別にエイリアンじゃないって事! まぁ予算の都合か怪物全体の着ぐるみorCGを作れなかったようで、遠めにチラチラ、もしくは酸のよだれ(…)をダラッと垂らす顔の超どアップでしか見せられてないから余り関係無いんですけどね。 Or rather, the problem is a fundamental biological identity of the monster is born by the genetic experiments were carried out secretly the giant, another thing I'm not aliens! Wearing schedule or budget of the entire monster Maa Nor could they pull the whole orCG like, shimmering in the far Me, drool or acid (...) I'm not involved, but is only showing up about not being from the cheese and dribble Daratsu the face.

そんな感じで相変わらずの超駄作。 Still super trash like that. 良かったのは宇宙船や惑星の施設なんかをワイヤーフレームで見せてた事くらい。 The good thing is I was shown around the wire frame to something more spaceships and planets. でもこれにしたって、誰がどこで…みたいなのをちゃんと指し示してないから何の意味も無い、完全な宝の持ち腐れでした。 What was it, but who and where from did not mean anything ... not even seems like a decent point, sit on the shelf was full.

And then there are reviews from commenters "baked pudding", "genie erotic erotic great" and others:
Worth zero, is the worst picture, no story.  レンタル代金返して欲しい! Rental price I want it back! ! こんな作品レンタルして欲しくない。 Do not want to rent this works. はっきり言ってエイリアンの名前を借りただましです。 The trick borrowed the name of the alien to be honest.
Disaster was the original manufacturer of transformers Even気Ga付Kanakatta released.
セットのチープさをごまかす為、画面を思いっきりボカす手法はこの会社が集めてくるC級映画に共通。 Cook for the cheap sets, restraint techniques Su Boca screen grabbing of the company's common to C grade movie.
また1枚無駄になりました。 The single one was wasted.

Sorry. つまらないです。 Is boring.
今までのエイリアンとはだいぶ違います。 Until now, much different and alien.
内容はありなのかもしれませんが、映画の映しかた? Although there may be a content, reflecting the film How? 展開がものたりない・・・・・ Unsatisfactory deployment
エイリアンがよく画面で観ることができず、人ばかり映してあるので、恐ろしさが感じられなかった・・・・ Screen can not often be seen aliens, it just reflects that people did not feel the fear
Oh yeah - These guys are mass-produced culture is genetic, why are not born本元upstream from the movies a lot! 本家のエイリアンシリーズは4で今のところ終わっているが、パクリ作品が進化してむりやりプレデターとも融合し、いったい最後はどうなるのか? Aliens of the upstream series of four so far have been done in combining work with the evolution of predator forcibly con man, the last is exactly what will happen?

Like I said -- it can be hard to translate properly. But who needs spoken language when there's this much love around? ;-)


4 comments:

Ian said...

Yours is truly the greatest blog in the galaxy, haha

Andrew Bellware said...

Ha! Thanks!

Lindsay Stewart said...

Cheese and dribble?

Sold!

i've watched some Japanese TV, they have different, um, standards. You need to cut some schoolgirl upskirts into the thing and you'll be golden in the land of the rising sun.

Andrew Bellware said...

Schoolgirls! Yes!